The Les who was more...
So here we are, a few dipshits on tour. We're rolling in an RV, cause we've always envied the retired.
We just got finished playing an acoustic show at CBC (who was very gracious and totally awesome by the way), and we're on our way to Great Falls, Montana. Unfortunately, the weather has taken a turn for the worse, and we're currently sitting just outside of Spokane, WA, parked and waiting out the storm. The roads are slick with ice, and a bitter wind is howling. At least the snow has let up.
We pulled off the freeway, intent on shutting down for the night. A misleading road sign had us driving up some back-country road that obviously hasn't been plowed since hell last froze over. We happen upon a church whose parking lot was big and empty enough to turn our behemoth vehicle, and are slowly making our way back to the main road.
At under 10mph, we pull up to a stop sign, only to find that our brakes have been rendered useless, sending us silently sliding off the pavement into a thick patch of mud. Everyone was safe, but the RV was stuck like a pig on a spit.
As we're calling around, desperately trying to find someone who can winch out an RV, along comes this middle-age guy bundled head to toe and toting a huge bag of white powder. Long story short, this crazy motherfucker (seriously, it's snowing. What's he doing out driving around?!) starts spreading his powder, something called "Suck-It Up," all over the ground around our tires, simultaneously pitching his product and insulting us "idiots" for getting stuck in the first place.
We're able to get out, therefore avoiding the undoubtedly horrendous winching fees.
The dude's name is Lester Kuty, as in cutie, as in "hey baby, you're a cutie *wink wink*" He refused our cash, but did make us buy his massive bag of Suck-It Up. Apparently this crap instantly turns anything you can imagine into a powdery substance. We're talking coffee, ice, urine, poop, whatever.
Anyone who knows me surely understands my excitement at the prospect of having unlimited substances turned into powder. Jay says we have to save the bag, in case we idiots get stuck again. But I'm already thinking of the endless possibilities of an instant powder-turner-into.
Yes, my dreams shall be sweet tonight…
PS Les actually founded and developed Suck-It Up. It’s not like he was just some dude who happened to have it in the back of his car. What a crazy situation, start to finish. Glad he happened to be driving by… We're deeply indebted
_dusty, lord of the white powder
We just got finished playing an acoustic show at CBC (who was very gracious and totally awesome by the way), and we're on our way to Great Falls, Montana. Unfortunately, the weather has taken a turn for the worse, and we're currently sitting just outside of Spokane, WA, parked and waiting out the storm. The roads are slick with ice, and a bitter wind is howling. At least the snow has let up.
We pulled off the freeway, intent on shutting down for the night. A misleading road sign had us driving up some back-country road that obviously hasn't been plowed since hell last froze over. We happen upon a church whose parking lot was big and empty enough to turn our behemoth vehicle, and are slowly making our way back to the main road.
At under 10mph, we pull up to a stop sign, only to find that our brakes have been rendered useless, sending us silently sliding off the pavement into a thick patch of mud. Everyone was safe, but the RV was stuck like a pig on a spit.
As we're calling around, desperately trying to find someone who can winch out an RV, along comes this middle-age guy bundled head to toe and toting a huge bag of white powder. Long story short, this crazy motherfucker (seriously, it's snowing. What's he doing out driving around?!) starts spreading his powder, something called "Suck-It Up," all over the ground around our tires, simultaneously pitching his product and insulting us "idiots" for getting stuck in the first place.
We're able to get out, therefore avoiding the undoubtedly horrendous winching fees.
The dude's name is Lester Kuty, as in cutie, as in "hey baby, you're a cutie *wink wink*" He refused our cash, but did make us buy his massive bag of Suck-It Up. Apparently this crap instantly turns anything you can imagine into a powdery substance. We're talking coffee, ice, urine, poop, whatever.
Anyone who knows me surely understands my excitement at the prospect of having unlimited substances turned into powder. Jay says we have to save the bag, in case we idiots get stuck again. But I'm already thinking of the endless possibilities of an instant powder-turner-into.
Yes, my dreams shall be sweet tonight…
PS Les actually founded and developed Suck-It Up. It’s not like he was just some dude who happened to have it in the back of his car. What a crazy situation, start to finish. Glad he happened to be driving by… We're deeply indebted
_dusty, lord of the white powder
posted by Sanction at 1:35 PM
5 Comments:
Haha, oh ya, btw it snows in Spokane alot. I'm glad that the "suck-it up" man came along just in time!!! It sounds like you are going to have a blast with it Dusty!! Don't listen to Jay, I'm sure you 'idiots' won't get stuck anymore...I told Jay you guys needed a new driver....just a suggestion....
Damn that is weird. Oddly enough,, Les Kuty is my crazy ass father in law. Matter of fact, I was google-ing Lester, and that's how I found your band. He's an eccentric, and your band rocks, so it's all good!
Hey Murray's Wine & Spirits
Is your father in law Les Kuty possibly the same Les that Waylon Jennings signed a "Thanks" to on a Taylor 915 guitar in 1992? If so I have that guitar and have been trying to figure out who the heck Les Kuty is.
Suck it up is so good it turns sh...into shinola. Send some to Port-Au-Prince Les u humanitarian.
Yes that in fact is the same Les Kuty, onepoundameat. He's still tooling around selling suck it up. I have a giant bag in my closet.
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